Hey "owns, I just heard on the news that AUSTRALIAN researchers have determined that if you mix diet cola instead of regular cola with vodka, you get drunk faster.
Which leads me to wonder,
...what the hell is wrong with you people?
Ya'll listen here, you need to understand we are the top of the food chain on alcohol because we wacky savages who descended from british criminals and have the top 5 most dangerous animals in the world. Now ya'll be kind ya here?