Did a bar crawl on the weekend and drank for 15hrs straight. Got complimented on my penis, and how Ron Jeremy has competition. Oh lawd, so eventful. Here's a memorable pic of me from this weekend:
Pink shirts were for the bar crawl (breast cancer awareness)
Nothing beats a penis compliment. Especially if you look like Martin Kampman
My last few minutes have been pretty eventful. Went out front to grab something out of the car and saw the neighbor lady pitching to her son. I was thinking "man that's cool for his mom to help him practice" but after two pitches she answers her cellphone and puts the practice on hold
Next I put the dog out back to let him deuce it up when out of nowhere two birds come falling into the yard whilst battling. The dog is all arch backed crapping when he sees them and goes in for the kill. He slows up once he gets to them and they take off. He just wanted to play
I laughed and told him to come in the house. He ignores me and looks as if he's trying to chase his tail but it's more like chasing his butt. I look closer and he's got a dingleberry the size of a vienna sausage being held on by what looks like grass.
Look around for something to grab the poo with but there's nothing so I bare hand it. It was similar to starting a chainsaw or lawnmower the way he took off. He had 3-4 inches of weeds holding that berry
Sorry if I grossed anyone out, just found it hilarious.