Great post jcal. I really agree with the first part.
I've been doing judo and BJJ for a while, and one thing I have noticed (both personally and by observing others) is that the best way to not gas is to just relax. Grappling is almost entirely technical and all about control. When you roll, if you are all worked up trying to exert as much strength as possible and trying to overpower your opponent, you will no doubt gas. Instead, just relax and rely on your technique. If your opponent/partner is going intense and trying to overpower you, just take a deep breath and use your skill to control him, without having to out-muscle him. It's the beauty of grappling.
You will notice 3 things when you do this. One, you won't gas (I don't remember the last time I really gassed when grappling). Two, your opponent will get frustrated. THey are exerting a ton of energy, you aren't, and they aren't getting anywhere. Three, you will become a much better grappler and your technique will only improve.
Team Stand Alone #1