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Old 02-12-2013, 11:30 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Zoo Hires Famed Pianist to Sexually Arouse Tortoises

Yes, you did read that right.

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Richard Clayderman is a famed French pianist who has released multiple albums and compilations of some of the most beauteous music ever composed. His newest stunt, put together by his record company and the London zoo, however, have some people scratching their collective heads.

This past Thursday, Mr. Clayderman played his music to a unique audience: tortoises. Why exactly did he do this? According to the Associated Press, it was "an attempt to put the reptiles in the mood to mate."

He serenaded the animals with "Ballade pour Adeline," one of his most famous pieces, then "Chariots of Fire." Unfortunately for the tortoise race, the music "did little to lift their spirits," and their interest only piqued "when zookeepers brought them some carrots."
sauce

Personally I think this might have helped...

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Old 02-12-2013, 11:34 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Hammerlock2.0 View Post
Yes, you did read that right.



sauce

Personally I think this might have helped...

Random as shit. Love it. He can't be that good if he failed though! They should probably just buy more carrots.
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Old 02-15-2013, 03:52 AM   #3 (permalink)
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I can't believe this thread hasn't been closed already..
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Old 02-15-2013, 04:06 AM   #4 (permalink)
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That's hilarious, not sure how I missed this thread.
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Old 02-15-2013, 04:07 AM   #5 (permalink)

 
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I can't believe this thread hasn't been closed already..
You really need to let it go.
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Old 02-15-2013, 04:11 AM   #6 (permalink)
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I have let it go, still doesn't stop me from exposing the hypocrisy of this forum.
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Old 02-15-2013, 04:16 AM   #7 (permalink)

 
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Tortoises doing the nasty to Marvin Gaye would be so hilarious
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Old 02-15-2013, 05:16 AM   #8 (permalink)
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listen to this, whilst looking at the picture. Sexy eh?



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Old 02-15-2013, 05:19 AM   #9 (permalink)

 
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I have let it go, still doesn't stop me from exposing the hypocrisy of this forum.
Oh yes. We're very exposed. Shame on us.

Best thread title of 2013 so far. I want to make a 'thread title award' for the end of year awards, just so this can win.
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Old 02-15-2013, 04:02 PM   #10 (permalink)
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