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post #41 of 48 (permalink) Old 06-07-2007, 07:53 PM
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lol @ the monopoly one
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post #42 of 48 (permalink) Old 06-07-2007, 08:40 PM
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Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands, they are now the islands

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC claiming that Law and Order are trademarks for his left and right legs
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post #43 of 48 (permalink) Old 06-07-2007, 08:59 PM
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here are my favorites.
As a teen chuck norris had sex with every nun in a covenant in the hills of tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the future 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated team in NFL history.

Every year on his birthday, chuck norris selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.

chuck norris once shot down a german plane by pointing 2 fingers in the air and saying "bang"

a blind man once stepped on chuck norris' shoe. chuck norris said "dont u know who i am? im chuck norris" the mere mention of his name instantaniously cured the mans blindness. unfortunately, the first and last thing the man saw was a round house kick delivered by chuck norris

wilt chamberlain has claimed to have slept with over 20,000 women, chuck norris calls this a "slow tuesday"

Team Stand Alone #1
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post #44 of 48 (permalink) Old 06-07-2007, 09:43 PM
Curitiba Food and Liquor
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chuck norris can eat a rubiks cube and sh!t it out solved

you guys have to have seen the shirt in spencer's
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post #45 of 48 (permalink) Old 06-07-2007, 10:14 PM
-I came|I saw|I failed-
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Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever the **** he wants.

Chuck Norris can speak braille.

Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
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post #46 of 48 (permalink) Old 06-08-2007, 07:00 PM
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Originally Posted by plazzman
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

HAHAHHAHA, funniest one yet for sure.
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post #47 of 48 (permalink) Old 06-11-2007, 04:26 PM
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God these crack me up so bad.

My favorite is:

Most people can write their names with piss in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name in concrete.
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post #48 of 48 (permalink) Old 06-11-2007, 04:47 PM
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chuck norris`s hand is the only hand that can beat a royal flush

chuck norris can win a game of connect four in only 3 moves
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