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post #11 of 30 (permalink) Old 10-22-2009, 02:13 AM
I eat babies
 
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There are traffic lights in my town that no matter what time of the day I come up to them or which direction I'm going, I WILL get the red light, no matter what, every single ******* time!

If you're in a hurry, everyone goes 5-10 miles below the speed limit. If you are casually driving, everyone is in a hurry to pass your ass.

Anytime I have any extra money, something random happens where I have to spend that money (flat tire, traffic ticket, overdrafting at the bank, etc.)
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post #12 of 30 (permalink) Old 10-22-2009, 02:43 AM
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If you drop food or drink, it will always fall over your crotch in a way that makes it look like you pissed yourself

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post #13 of 30 (permalink) Old 10-22-2009, 12:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WouldLuv2FightU View Post
There are traffic lights in my town that no matter what time of the day I come up to them or which direction I'm going, I WILL get the red light, no matter what, every single ******* time!

If you're in a hurry, everyone goes 5-10 miles below the speed limit. If you are casually driving, everyone is in a hurry to pass your ass.

Anytime I have any extra money, something random happens where I have to spend that money (flat tire, traffic ticket, overdrafting at the bank, etc.)
I always said that anyone driving faster than me is an a55hole and anyone driving slower than me is an idiot. My wife says I think I'm driving the pace car
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post #14 of 30 (permalink) Old 10-22-2009, 12:43 PM Thread Starter
Curitiba Food and Liquor
 
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I always said that anyone driving faster than me is an a55hole and anyone driving slower than me is an idiot. My says I think I'm driving the pace car
Hello! We ARE driving the pace car! I live in NASCAR country, although I am not a fan, and we all think we are.

The most sleepy looking, coolest animal in the zoo will erupt into entertaining cavorting and capers 5 minutes after you go to look at something else.


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post #15 of 30 (permalink) Old 10-22-2009, 04:52 PM
I eat babies
 
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Anytime you wanna show someone something that's really cool, something happens to prevent the cool thing from happening, thus making you look like a liar and an idiot.

I don't know if this is just me or what, but whenever I just SEE someone with a cold sore, I almost always get one within the next few days.
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post #16 of 30 (permalink) Old 10-22-2009, 07:45 PM
LEGEN...wait for it...DARY
 
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Old men will walk around the locker room naked for at least 5 minutes after they have showered! It is there duty apparently.
And try to talk to you about something while they are just f*cking old and naked.

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If you drop food or drink, it will always fall over your crotch in a way that makes it look like you pissed yourself
or if you go to the bathroom and wash your hands like you are supposed to you will splash water on or around your crotch and in the even that you don't it is because the counter was at the perfect height to let your pants (crotch area) rest up against it and get wet.

Quote:
Originally Posted by WouldLuv2FightU View Post
I don't know if this is just me or what, but whenever I just SEE someone with a cold sore, I almost always get one within the next few days.
I would recommend not making out with people while they have cold sores.

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post #17 of 30 (permalink) Old 10-22-2009, 09:01 PM Thread Starter
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Old and naked. LMAO. I'm surprised that given all my time spent in locker rooms, this never happened to me.

I have had someone talk to me while she was naked shaving her legs in the sink, though. I'm not sure if that's hot, but you guys probably think it is.


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post #18 of 30 (permalink) Old 10-23-2009, 01:46 AM
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post #19 of 30 (permalink) Old 10-23-2009, 03:13 PM
LEGEN...wait for it...DARY
 
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Old and naked. LMAO. I'm surprised that given all my time spent in locker rooms, this never happened to me.

I have had someone talk to me while she was naked shaving her legs in the sink, though. I'm not sure if that's hot, but you guys probably think it is.
leg hair is not hot even when it is being shaved off

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post #20 of 30 (permalink) Old 10-23-2009, 03:15 PM
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Was thinking the same thing.

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