The Laws of the Universe Thread
Certain laws of the universe are a given, like, the other line moves faster, hot women being with total douchebags b/c they have a lot of money, and so forth.
I want to dig a little deeper though, because sometimes we talk about laws of the universe that are not talked about.
COULD YOU, LIKE, GET LESS STUFF?
If you go into your favorite restaurant and you see that you have your least favorite server in the section where you sit, you can be sure that the people before you will have given him or her a very detailed order for a vast amount of food, with explanations for each request. The server's patience will be worn to a fine thread by the time they get to you and you just got boned, cuz.
If you are in an eating/drinking establishmen with your significant other, superior at work, lifelong friend, or anyone whom you need to have an exceptionally important conversation with at that time, for whatever reason, someone will pump enough to significantly defray the debt of several African nations into the jukebox, playing the worst music you can think of that is the polar opposite of whatever mood you are trying to create or advance.
Whenever two or more women are in one place by themselves, they lez out. Cartman referenced this in the "Marjorine" episode of South Park whilst preparing Butters to attend the sleepover. I have been told that whenever a group of men are suddenly quiet for any reason, it is because they sense that somewhere, women lezzed out. I realize there is a "if a tree falls in the forest does anyone hear it" factor, and I can't recall the last time that I saw a group of men be quiet, but my source was the great MC, and he has Emerson-conferred knowledge.
OK guys, your turn.
Sig Credit to Toxic