Early one morning I awoke from bed a happy lad
I knew today was going to be the happiest day I'd ever had
The sun was out the birds would sing, I was eager to have the things this perfect day would bring
The air was fresh, my mood was enhancing,
I glared across the table to see my banana was dancing
I thought to myself, I must be crazy,
but now was not the time to sit down and be lazy
I must hurry outside, rapid and quick, today was my date with that one special chick
It was the child of my neighbor, his sweet young daughter, she made me knees shake and made the sun burn hotter
But all was not all well across on the neighbors land
Her dad looked down at me fierce, cold, wicked and bland
he says 'stay away from my daughter you wicked son of the devil from a rock band!"
I stood there still, solid and scared
Thinking to myself 'if I could only tell you the dirty things we shared'
She came running out fast, we escaped to my car,
we peeled out in a hurry but didn't make it very far
Thinking to myself, is something going wrong?
I just want to take her out to get drunk and play ping-pong My car was stalled, the engine was dead
her dad was after me to put a bullet through my head
This was not kool, I must do something back,
I needed to think quick and find a way to attack
of course I was powerless, there was nothing I could do, my mind said; "if I get out of this car that man will kill you"
I turned to her and begged for her to plea
I need anything, just something for my chance to flea
I was running out of time before I had a brilliant thought,
There was a 40oz under the seat that I had forgot I bought
I opened the cap and began to drink,
I actually become bullet proof when I start to drink
This was a good idea so we drank it all
the liquid was courage it made me feel like metal.
I got out of the car and took a mighty spill
my plan wasn't off to a great start like my mind had fulfilled.
he walked to my body which was motionless on the ground,
when I had another bright idea to turn the situation around
With a swift movement and a kick, he dropped his gun,
it was just me and him now, 1 on 1.
My girl cried out loud as the battle raged on
Hits landed back and forth as a nearby crowd was drawn
When suddenly my brain came back to me with another good plan,
But my brain has gotten me in this much trouble right up to the fight with this man
Soo much for the bright ideas my brain had,
but I then thought again, 1 out of 3 ideas going right isn't bad!
My girl turned the key and the car roared to life,
this girl is on par with me, like we were husband and wife
I turned around and ran back to my wheels,
away from the scene we sped in a hurry with that 2 tons of steel
We were free and alone, finally at last,
my mind, car and face were all beaten and trashed
But my special girl was with me to help me feel good
She does it very well like a real woman should
As this tale concludes and you thinbk about what you've learned,
don't ever f*ck with the wicked son of the devil from a rock band
This tell tale story is officially adjourned.