You would be well prepared for any confrontation and have a distinct advantage. You'd smash that guy.
Not all girls have psycho ex-BFs and love men that treat them like shit, but often the ones that do learn from it and try to find a great guy like you.
Edit: I just reread your post. If she wants to get more serious with you, she needs to greatly reduce if not cut off all contact with her asshole ex. Her own safety is also at issue if she stays friends with him, from your description.
Now go Wanderize a fool.
Getting ready to watch one of the DVDs I got, either the 1st three Alien movies or Silence of the Lambs, Hannibal, Manhunter.
Manhunter!! lost classic with Grissom!