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Old 09-26-2011, 05:56 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Drunk Adventures

Motivated thanks to this past weekend, let's hear some funny drunk stories about yours or your friends lives.
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Old 09-26-2011, 07:00 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I read some of your "slept in" and "woke up in" stories in the WAYDRN thread so, in that spirit...

I once woke up naked in an unfamiliar car with an old woman knocking on the window. I pretended to still be out until I thought she was gone. I got out of the car to find myself at a beach cottage and the woman was on the porch calling the police. I stole a towel off of the porch rail and ran for the beach.

I was about 18. Had been to a toga party.
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Old 09-26-2011, 10:10 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Should be a good topic!
Can't recall anything awesome to share atm.. hence the 'drunk' in 'drunk adventures'.
Haven't drank in like 3+ weeks too..
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Old 09-26-2011, 10:44 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Most of my drunk stories are more scary than funny. I remember one time when I was partying a two hour drive away from home and I remember... well I think I remember lying down and falling asleep there. The next thing I remember is waking up in my own bed. To this day I don't know how I got home.

One time I found out that "in my pants" jokes actually work on 1 out of 20 drunk chicks. Then I fell asleep after third base.

I've got at least two more I can think of right now but first I need to get some food.
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Old 09-26-2011, 01:59 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I have slept 3 times at the police station for abusive drinking, sneaky f*cking russian.
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Old 09-26-2011, 02:38 PM   #6 (permalink)
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This next ones rather embarrassing than funny. So i attended this nice get together, a party rather. You know, with reserved tables and all. So i was there, all dressed up nice and stuff until "Frank The Tank" inside me got out. Ended up hitting on y friends mom, sleeping in an abandoned cottage next to the place the party was. Somehow i still ended up in my friends house, waking up in their kitchen on my undies with my cell phone in that extra pocket. What the shit... There is a part II to this story.
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Old 09-26-2011, 03:08 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I was on my first deployment and we stoped in Bah Rayne.(MSP) (There are a lot of stories that start that way). I was out with 2 of my friends. We came up with a plan. 1 person buys 3 shots, The other buys 3 beers. We are about 3 hours into it and I am teetering on the verge of blacking out. I go to the men's room. While Im in there I over hear a guy talking about playing "Sweet Home Alabama" on stage during a break of the ppl playing. He says that all he needs is a bassist and a singer. I tell him I can play bass and I know that song. Which I do. But I also tell him I can sing it too. Which I can't lol. He tells me great and he will call me up when its time. I go back to drinking....I enter the black out.....Now I come back to my senses with a hooker on my lap and the guy up on stage calling my name....I get up to realize 1 of 2 things happened....I either got a little too happy or couldnt hold my urine while the hooker was on my lap. So I go to the stage with the entire front of my jeans soaked.....The guy starts playing the intro.....I come in with the bass like a boss.....Then I realize I'm so fn shitfaced I don't know the words......So I got him to start over.....Thinking I could remember the words in the brief pause....I don't so I just start screaming SWEET HOME ALABAMA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! In the mic ...I thought it sounded good ....but it didnt haha....So I do what any gentleman would do....I look into the crowd and said.."I gotta go I think I pissed my self"....Went back to my table ,got the hooker back in my lap,ordered another round of shots and finished the night off!!
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Old 09-26-2011, 06:00 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Do disgusting drunken stories count too?
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Old 09-26-2011, 06:11 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hawndo View Post
Do disgusting drunken stories count too?
YES!
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Old 09-26-2011, 06:54 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by G_Land View Post
I was on my first deployment and we stoped in Bah Rayne.(MSP) (There are a lot of stories that start that way). I was out with 2 of my friends. We came up with a plan. 1 person buys 3 shots, The other buys 3 beers. We are about 3 hours into it and I am teetering on the verge of blacking out. I go to the men's room. While Im in there I over hear a guy talking about playing "Sweet Home Alabama" on stage during a break of the ppl playing. He says that all he needs is a bassist and a singer. I tell him I can play bass and I know that song. Which I do. But I also tell him I can sing it too. Which I can't lol. He tells me great and he will call me up when its time. I go back to drinking....I enter the black out.....Now I come back to my senses with a hooker on my lap and the guy up on stage calling my name....I get up to realize 1 of 2 things happened....I either got a little too happy or couldnt hold my urine while the hooker was on my lap. So I go to the stage with the entire front of my jeans soaked.....The guy starts playing the intro.....I come in with the bass like a boss.....Then I realize I'm so fn shitfaced I don't know the words......So I got him to start over.....Thinking I could remember the words in the brief pause....I don't so I just start screaming SWEET HOME ALABAMA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! In the mic ...I thought it sounded good ....but it didnt haha....So I do what any gentleman would do....I look into the crowd and said.."I gotta go I think I pissed my self"....Went back to my table ,got the hooker back in my lap,ordered another round of shots and finished the night off!!
I lol'd

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