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Old 03-03-2009, 03:07 PM   #271 (permalink)
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Have you been on sickipedia by any chance?
No but I'm sure my friend has as these were emailed to me
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Old 03-03-2009, 04:09 PM   #272 (permalink)
LEGEN...wait for it...DARY
 
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Guy pulls up to a prostitute and asks, "how much for a blowjob?"

She says, "$100".

He says, "OK and starts jerking off"

She says, "What the hell are you doing?"

He says, "for a $100 I ain't giving you th eeasy one."
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Old 03-06-2009, 12:41 PM   #273 (permalink)
LEGEN...wait for it...DARY
 
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This joke has nothing to do with the family being Jewish, but it is how I heard it...so here goes:

A Jewish kid walks into his parents bedroom while they are having sex and says, "Papa what is going on?"

His dad replies, "Son, we are making a child."

The boy says, "Okay" and walks out.

The next week he walks into his parents bedroom and his mom is sucking his dad's cock. He says, "Mama, what are you doing?"

She responds, "we are making jewelery."
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Old 03-12-2009, 11:28 PM   #274 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ZZtigerZZ81 View Post
This joke has nothing to do with the family being Jewish, but it is how I heard it...so here goes:

A Jewish kid walks into his parents bedroom while they are having sex and says, "Papa what is going on?"

His dad replies, "Son, we are making a child."

The boy says, "Okay" and walks out.

The next week he walks into his parents bedroom and his mom is sucking his dad's cock. He says, "Mama, what are you doing?"

She responds, "we are making jewelery."

No need for the disclaimer ZZ, us Jews are all well aware of the fact that after college, you don't get a BJ from any Jewish girl, ever. Unless of course you're on vacation or like was mentioned, buying some jewelry. Car probably works, too.

Okay, a friend told me this one:

What is the worst book Helen Keller ever read?

A cheese grater.
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Old 03-12-2009, 11:30 PM   #275 (permalink)
LEGEN...wait for it...DARY
 
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Originally Posted by CornbreadBB View Post
No need for the disclaimer ZZ, us Jews are all well aware of the fact that after college, you don't get a BJ from any Jewish girl, ever. Unless of course you're on vacation or like was mentioned, buying some jewelry. Car probably works, too.

Okay, a friend told me this one:

What is the worst book Helen Keller ever read?

A cheese grater.
I thought they meant she was about to get a pearl necklace.
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Old 03-13-2009, 07:46 PM   #276 (permalink)
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What did the black lady get after she had an abortion?


She got a thank you card and a $200 gift card from crime stoppers
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Old 03-14-2009, 11:46 AM   #277 (permalink)
LEGEN...wait for it...DARY
 
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Why did God send Terry Schiavo to Hell?

Because she committed the sin of sloth
-------------------------------------------------

Why did they create white chocolate?

So little black kids could get all messy too.
-------------------------------------------------

What happens when you stick your arm in a jar of jelly beans?

The black ones steal your watch.
-------------------------------------------------
A jewish guy, an italian, and a black guy are all sitting in a bar when a really old guy walks in. The Jewish guy says, "that guy is so old he could be God." They decide to send the old guy a drink. After finishing the old man comes over to thank them...and the Jew says the only reason we sent it to ya is because you are so old you could be god. The old man says I am God. Puts his hand on the man's head and said you have a brain tumor...you have 1 year to live, but now you are fine. Puts his hand on the Italian's stomach and says, undiagnosed prostate cancer...you have 6 weeks to live, but now you are fine.

The black man says, "God, keep your f*ckin hands off me...I am on disability."
-------------------------------------------------

How did the Polish helicopter crash?

The pilot got cold and turned off the fan.
-------------------------------------------------

What is the difference between a Texan and a hog?

A hog doesn't have to get drunk to f*ck a hog.
-------------------------------------------------

A couple of Polish guys go hunting...they take two guns and three dogs...an hour later they come back for more dogs.
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Old 03-14-2009, 03:39 PM   #278 (permalink)
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What do Etheopians do at night?

Starve
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Old 03-14-2009, 03:41 PM   #279 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by plazzman View Post
What do Etheopians do at night?

Starve
lol that reminds me, there was this stand up comic but i cant remember who, who made the point that these starving ppl ho has to walk 5 hours each way every day to get water why they just dont move closer to the water
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Old 03-14-2009, 04:28 PM   #280 (permalink)
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whats funnier then a dead baby, a dead baby in a clown suit.
why do you put a baby in a blender head first? to watch its feet spin.
why do you put a baby in the blender feet first? to see the expression on its face.
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